Divorce a symptom, not the cause
There is little cause to be surprised, much less shocked, by the finding, reported by this paper yesterday, that a growing number of women in the city are walking out of marriage citing lack of sexual satisfaction. While old-timers may well cluck their tongues and wring their hands about the changing mores of the younger set, it cannot be denied that this is but a natural outcome of the growing familial clout, social awareness, and monetary and educational empowerment of women. And it is all to the good.
Every man who hasn’t renounced the world would agree that the right to a healthy and happy life necessarily includes the right to a good, safe, and satisfying sexual life. And what is sauce for the gander cannot but be sauce for the goose as well. In fact, given the reigning conservatism in Indian society, there is something to be said for the women who are honest, and brave, enough to admit that they are dissatisfied and walk out instead of submitting to the temptation to lump it and stay on in an unhappy marriage or, worse, cheat on their partners.
Admittedly, rising divorce rates are not a healthy sign for any society, more so one predicated as firmly on the primacy of the family as the Indian one. But divorce is but a remedy for something that has already gone horribly wrong with a marriage; it is not the cause of the rupture but the result of it. And the focus of society, if indeed it is as worried about these trends as it often appears to be, should be to fix the problems with, and within, marriage rather than paper over them and pretend that all is well.
Let’s not forget: it takes two happy, well-adjusted individuals to make one happy marriage, but just one unhappy individual to destroy it.
There is little cause to be surprised, much less shocked, by the finding, reported by this paper yesterday, that a growing number of women in the city are walking out of marriage citing lack of sexual satisfaction. While old-timers may well cluck their tongues and wring their hands about the changing mores of the younger set, it cannot be denied that this is but a natural outcome of the growing familial clout, social awareness, and monetary and educational empowerment of women. And it is all to the good.
Every man who hasn’t renounced the world would agree that the right to a healthy and happy life necessarily includes the right to a good, safe, and satisfying sexual life. And what is sauce for the gander cannot but be sauce for the goose as well. In fact, given the reigning conservatism in Indian society, there is something to be said for the women who are honest, and brave, enough to admit that they are dissatisfied and walk out instead of submitting to the temptation to lump it and stay on in an unhappy marriage or, worse, cheat on their partners.
Admittedly, rising divorce rates are not a healthy sign for any society, more so one predicated as firmly on the primacy of the family as the Indian one. But divorce is but a remedy for something that has already gone horribly wrong with a marriage; it is not the cause of the rupture but the result of it. And the focus of society, if indeed it is as worried about these trends as it often appears to be, should be to fix the problems with, and within, marriage rather than paper over them and pretend that all is well.
Let’s not forget: it takes two happy, well-adjusted individuals to make one happy marriage, but just one unhappy individual to destroy it.
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